Pensées Stupides

Dor

2006-11-03T01:46:00.000+05:30

I am not a movie buff; I don't watch movies as soon as they are released or pick out obscure ones that a select few have gone gaga over.

I watch movies if and only if I have company to do it.

So, last Saturday, as Aarti, Manu, Vivek, and I reached Forum after dinner in The Hungry Buddha, we didn't really anticipate that we were going to watch a really nice movie. Yes, the reviews were good but like they say for the pudding, the proof is in the experience. And what an experience it was!

For starters, the contrasting landscapes sort of sets the principal characters apart. Like the barren desert with soft undulating sands washing over towns and the countryside, Meera (Ayesha Takia) is a young bride who lives her life under the feet of the men in her family. Solely devoted to her husband (I was extremely surprised to see Anirudh, a Kannada theater and TV actor as Shankar Singh, her husband), she meekly follows orders and bears all painful references by her mother-in-law towards the caring Shankar. Up north, amidst the cold winds of the Himachal, a resourceful woman Zeenat (Gul Panag, a revelation) accepts a proposal from her "fiance" and shows gumption to make a living even after wedding and her husband goes to Saudi Arabia to..what else...make money.

Some months later, fate drives Zeenat in search of Meera. On the way, Zeenat encounters a human chameleon, simply called Behrupiya (Shreyas Talpade, the pick of the cast). At once entertaining and dubious, he accompanies Zeenat in her quest for Meera. As the two women finally meet and befriend each other, they realize that they have much in common, despite the glaring differences. Until the day comes when their friendship is set to face the trial by fire.

Nagesh Kukunoor is an intelligent filmmaker. He knows the pulse of the audience and with some God-given gift, manages to create films that appeal to a wide audience, without stoking their expectations too much. When I saw 3 Deewarein some years ago, I was blown away by Juhi Chawla's performance. And he went ahead and made Iqbal. Which was easily one of the best triumph-of-spirit genre of movies from Indian mainstream cinema I've seen in some time. And now, Dor is that kind of movie that you wouldn't expect a suave director like Nagesh to make. Then again, there no rules to creativity, so this works and works exceedingly well.

Though I ain't no expert in cinematography, I can guess that it takes a lot of effort to capture the emotions and moods of actors when there's not much makeup. To ensnare that natural look without letting it show as "jet-lag" or "the morning after look" is a pretty good skill and the camerawork for this movie is quite impressive. Ditto the background music, full of Rajasthani folk songs and a very hummable "Yeh hausla kyun jhuke".

The best certification came from my friend Vivek, who has a tremendous anathema to Bollywood. He's the kind of guy who doesn't mind watching a Chinese flick dubbed in Tamil coming in Vijay TV instead of "Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna".

"Lovely movie" is what he said.

RATING: 4.5/5

When Bangalore was burning...

2006-10-19T14:05:00.000+05:30

For long, Bangalore had been a peaceful city. Lush with parks, sedate traffic, laidback cafes (most famous among them being The India Coffee House on the erstwhile sparsely populated M.G.Road), it was deservingly called Pensioners' Paradise.

Now, Bangalore doesn't hesitate to erupt over the slightest incident. The death of Dr. Rajkumar in April saw brainless acts of extreme violence and most of the targets were innocent houses and corporate buildings which suffered huge losses of property. Loads of people lost their lives due to mindless miscreants (some of whom were allegedly paid to create disturbance and thereby show the current govt's inability to handle law and order issues). The roads remained blackish for a few weeks and only when the first showers of monsoon arrived did they come back to their original tint.

Couple of days ago, there was an accident on Airport Road. Apparently, a Volvo bus under the service of BMTC creamed two bikes and an auto-rickshaw before ploughing into HAL staffers waiting for their shuttle bus on the sidewalk. Result: two lives lost and more disturbingly, a mob venting fury on the bus, each of which costs Rs. 75 lakh for BMTC to purchase and approx Rs. 54 per kilometre to operate. The full details can be read here...

The burned down BMTC Volvo bus
(Picture courtesy: www.ibnlive.com)

The driver has since been arrested and his claim that the brakes flopped, leading to the accident, has been blown away by statements by both BMTC officers and Volvo experts who have categorically said that Volvo buses have quite powerful brakes. (I can vouch for that to a little extent, having smacked my knee painfully while traveling to Tirupati on a KSTDC bus some months ago).

Be that as it may, the point remains that Bangalore's janta is increasingly showing a profound lack of respect towards public property. And this is not an isolated incident. Late July, a similar private demon bus knocked down a female pillion rider and ran over her, leading to an irate reaction from the people who not surprisingly resorted to burning the bus down. Torching buses is not only an insult to human sensibilities but also betrays an anger that is destructive and extremely contagious.

I read this quote by Mahatma Gandhi somewhere.

"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind."

When are we going to stop blinding one another like this?

Every roz (morning) has a marathon...

2006-09-19T22:09:00.000+05:30

BEFORE

Yatin, me, and Vikrant before the marathon started. Notice the smiles which are due to the cloudy weather, assuming 7 km will be a piece of cake.

AFTER

Here's what a marathon will do if there was no practice. And notice the sun beating down cruelly.

But one friend of mine was still feeling quite ok.

Honestly, running in a marathon is an enjoyable experience. Notwithstanding breathless gasps for air, its a load of fun to watch the young and the old participate in their own ways. There were lots of corporate guys with their beer bellies jingling at each step, pretty young things running in jeans (ok, I have heard about warmups, but denims for running???), celebs huffing and puffing after the Celebration Run (I congratulated a rather pinkish looking Pankaj Advani on winning the Khel Ratna award), a supremely fantastic looking Keerti Reddy, kids from abroad and from homes like Bosco, Kushal foundation-they were all there. And it was truly a celebration of life.

With a bit more practice, next run at Mumbai Marathon in January. Gotta recover from the stiff knees soon though...:)

Our baby...

2006-09-03T00:53:00.000+05:30

...is born.

ONE OF MY BEST DAYS OF THE YEAR!!!

Our volunteer group ~Pankhudi was officially registered as an NGO in Mumbai yesterday. The people involved with the process have been many so it would not be right to name just a few and say "Congratulations". Its only fair that all of us in the group soak in the sweet feeling of happiness at being recognized, with the quiet realization that we were all in it together and still are.

Did we really need a Rang De Basanti?

2006-08-29T23:20:00.000+05:30

A fortnight ago, I was out with friends for our regular Sat nite dinner. Post dinner circa 11PM, we were about disperse after dropping off a friend in his home, when the rain came down in buckets. It didnt seem to subside (and since we had come in bikes), we decided to watch a movie and spend the night in his home. We were running through his list of DVDs when I thought of putting RDB.

A friend said, "No, put something else".

Our host dude remarked, "Why dude? Dont you like RDB? You must be one of those specimen Indians who dont like RDB. Or probably didnt understand it." and let out a laugh.

The guy who refused to watch RDB blew his top and screamed, "Whats the big deal about RDB man? What is the @#$&* big deal? You think we Indians need a movie like that to remind us how great we are? What untapped potential lies within us? How unity can make us such a force to reckon with? You think we youngsters are so dumb that we need reminders like that to understand that we have a responsibility towards this country? GIMME A BREAK!!!"

We ended up watching "2 Fast 2 Furious" on Star movies and later "Glory road" on DVD.

Chase the sun

2006-08-16T22:20:00.000+05:30

I have a major dislike for disco songs, especially the trance variety. To start with, they are so noisy I can't even recognize the melody in them. If they do have any, that is. Secondly, most of their videos are either full of garish lights or doped out sluts or both. And most importantly, the ones which are really popular are in turn copied so amateurishly by Bollywood, the outcome is an undisputed cacophony, so gloriously named Techno mix or some such horsecrap.

But there is one song, an old one (5 years is old in these days or meteoric technological advancement in everything), that is trance-ish ambient. I like this song a lot though its a bit one-dimensional like all trance numbers are. I love the female voice solo in the middle. And when I saw the video, my mental images of a blurring landscape as seen by a low-flying jet were dispelled by people presumably deranged and staring at light. But that didn't stop me from viewing it again. Here it is:

Video courtesy: www.youtube.com

I am a paradox, I am not...

2006-08-07T23:03:00.000+05:30

I am an ox, I am a bull
I am clever, I am a fool
I thought I knew it, I didn't know
I am the rock, I am the river in flow

I am dazed, I am in control
I wander about, I have a goal
This is it, no there's more to come
Seems the world doesn't have just two poles

I have taken, I have given
I thought there was no heaven or hell

I remembered, I forgot
I am a paradox, I am not

I am moving, I am still
I am the ink, I am the quill
I was wrong, I was right
I am chained, I am in flight

I sang, I cried
I am alive, I died
I am cold, I am fried
I am the truth, yet I lied

I recalled, I forgot
I am a paradox, Oh no, I am not!!!

Whose dead man's "chest" is it?

2006-08-03T23:55:00.000+05:30

Picture courtesy: www.imdb.com

+

Very good fare, antics aplenty from Johnny Depp, a deadlier breed of pirates, stunning makeovers, super background score (especially when The Kraken is at work, slicing ships into two)

I got the impression that this was very Johnny Depp-centric. The end is extremely abrupt and too obviously contrived to let viewers know that the 3^rd is on the way. A bit of sentimentality slows the movie occasionally.

Still....

4.5/5

An idea can save your life...

2006-07-30T08:57:00.000+05:30

That's probably what the babus in the railway ministry thought regarding the move to banish non-passengers from railway platforms in a bid to increase safety and security of passengers.

The rationale seems to be focused on the extremely affordable price of a platform ticket (Rs.3) which is peanuts for a criminal. So, they go and ban platform tickets and non-travelers from even entering the platforms. Like in the airports.

For some reason, I think this is more of a case of fixing a stronger bolt to the gate protecting the shed that was destroyed by the horse that "bolted" away. Or, more horses waiting to run.

Consider 9/11. Some of the terrorists involved in that went to the extent of even enrolling for pilot training programs and getting formal licenses through fair means until the day of the strikes. Does the railway ministry think that a bomber is shy of shelling out a few more hundred rupees for a traveling ticket to get access to a train? They should be thinking more about screening baggage and cargo items that go into a train. Whats the point in isolating the people who might have come just to help an elderly couple on to a train after they have finished visiting their loved ones in another city?

Two fires can't kill each other, can they?

2006-07-26T22:58:00.000+05:30

Just read the news that Andy Roddick has agreed to be coached by Jimmy Connors. Wonder what will come out of this. Definitely no dearth of fighting spirit, I expect.

Workshops and workaholics...

2006-07-22T21:01:00.000+05:30

Been wondering if my motivation at work is diluted by money. The prospect of a payhike is a never-ending carrot-and-stick game for a neutral observer, but I still couldn't care less. After all, the world (especially the corporate) speaks the language of greenbacks and I understand the machinations that go with it to a decent extent.

But I had been to a workshop today on "Fund-raising by NGOs" and for some time, talk hovered around what motivates people in rural areas to work for a pittance. Even nothing occasionally. It was difficult for a novice volunteer working in a giant like SAP Labs to understand the levels of passion that reside in people who don't mind living in villages where, in order to get a matchbox, you need to travel about 3km for the nearest provisions store. Which is often closed. So, effectively, the day begins and ends with sunrise and sunset respectively. Funny? Well, for most people (read party animals and/or call center employees), its the reverse. The village community is close-knit and to initiate even a simple thing like health awareness for women will take atleast 2-3 years. The time taken to receive and verify results is more.

Towards the end of the workshop, there came a man called John Devaraj. A celebrity sculptor, theatreperson, movie art director, and children's rights activist rolled into one. He takes in children who are forced into labour and tries to give them opportunities that enable them (in his own words) "articulate their dreams and aspirations, thereby giving themselves an insight into the gifts they have". He mentioned an Asia-wide congregation of art this December and invited us to a play that he is putting up with good number of street boys and girls.

On a lighter note, before the workshop started, a guy walked in when my friend and I were talking to Anna, the coordinator of the workshop. This guy is the same fresh volunteer I spoke about earlier and was asked by Anna where his friend was after the intros were over. He replied saying his friend was down with a backache. Anna, concerned, asked what happened. He said it was because of some marathon his friend ran. My friend and I exchanged thoroughly wide-eyed glances. Because, we are planning to run in the Bangalore marathon this September and given our recently diminished physical agility, I was curious enough to ask the guy how many kms his friend ran. He said "10km". I was now panic-stricken. Because, I was planning to run 14km!

"My family and other globalisers"

2006-07-18T12:17:00.000+05:30

This article has appeared in Readers' Digest, July 2006 issue. Thought those who couldn't read it, can do so...

Dreamers exist, but the people who destroy the dreams of idealists are those with an inability to understand them.

Dealing with emergency...

2006-07-11T22:40:00.000+05:30

Anyone watching "NatGeo Investigates" will know the metronomic, cold precision in which famed aircrashes, doomed ships (not Titanic, of course, we have to thank James Cameron for providing a 3 hour tearjerker), nuclear disasters, train catastrophes among others are dissected. Last night, I was watching the episode in which a Swissair flight from New York bound to Geneva crashed sometime after take-off in Halifax in late 1998. The reconstruction of the tragedy was based entirely on the report conducted by the investigators, one of whom also spoke on the program. The program was brutally faithful to the supposed timeline of the accident, which led my mother to cringe in a mixture of shock and revulsion. I was the opposite, mouth agape and motionless, wonderstruck by the professionalism of the investigators who had cracked the case inspite of the aircraft being smashed to smithereens and the "black box" failing to capture the most critical part of the event.

Where this show appeals to me is in the way the actors who enact the situations. Panic and horrifying realizations are the norm but these guys act so naturally. The almost-ghostly narrator with his chilling voice adds on the eerie effect (methinks this was what left my mom half-reeling). And the poignancy that follows the aftermath of the incident is quite deep and the pain of most of the relatives of the victims pretty palpable, even after several years. The most interesting thing is that even if the case seems utterly hopeless, the emergency crew are on the ready, raring to help at risk to their own beings.

So, with 8 lethal bombings, Mumbai bears the brunt of urban genocide again. 130+ dead, many more injured. A vast majority on the lifeline of the metro: commuter trains. Having traveled in a super-crowded one recently, I can't help but think how it would be if one such incident happened when I was inside. With absolutely no inch to move, not even able to check whether someone whacked your wallet or not, local trains are to God the same way as how jam bottles are to us mortals. Is there anyone to monitor or prepare for any kind of emergency? I doubt it.

Farewell, my idol...

2006-07-06T11:40:00.000+05:30

Picture courtesy: www.soccernet.espn.go.com

Two modern football legends perform the ultimate act of respect for the opponent. Zinédine Yazid Zidane (R) lives to fight another day, but Luís Filipe Madeira Caeiro Figo (L) might have played his last match for Portugal. Brought together by a policy which has now virtually destroyed a club, the warrior friends were the only "galacticos" in a team of flattering superstars.

At least, Zidane already has 2 national honors to show (FIFA World Cup '98 and UEFA EURO 2000). But, poor Figo has nothing. Apart from a wealth of wonderful memories of jaw-dropping dribbling and a clutch of club victories. Mercenary he may have been, but a self-centric, one-trick pony, he is not.

THANK YOU FOR THE WONDERFUL MEMORIES!!!

So...?

2006-07-02T23:53:00.000+05:30

Gamesmanship? What of Herr Klinsmann during his "glory" days with Inter Milan and erstwhile West Germany? I am sure he was as good a diver as anyone now. And the legacy continues with that hyper-annoying Miroslav Klose and his robotic body language.

Unwatchable? Then, go watch some candy-floss Karan Johar flick instead. Or better still, watch the episode in "Rendezvous" where he is being interviewed by Simi Garewal. It is so delicate that viewer discretion is advised against "minimal user experience". This is the FIFA World Cup, a contact sport's biggest championship. Not some Tom & Jerry cartoon show.

Rough and dirty tackling? What of the Italians in '82? West Germans in '90? Almost a majority of the sides in USA '94? the South Koreans in '02? Don't tell me that they were angels with studs.

And last but not the least, why is any team that wins against England portrayed as cunning, cheating group of streetsmart footballers? Get out of your colonial hangover, you snobs! And accept the game for what it is now. Sometimes, the best team will not win. (I readily admit that neither England nor Portugal deserved to win the match). Take it or take a hike to Greenland.

I am in no way condoning Luiz Felipe Scolari. I hate his tactics as much as anyone else does. But, does a student complain if the college lecturer gives a couple of extra marks for a mediocre answer in a theory paper? Does a motorist hesitate to leave when the traffic cop stops him for risky driving and lets him go without a fine here? NO, and so will I. The dream is still alive and to me, that's all that matters.

"Unwatchable brand of soccer"...hmm...I guess you are watching too many Adidas football ads on TV, mate!

Vengeance is sweet...

2006-06-25T18:20:00.000+05:30

Four years ago, on a painful June day in the Far East, a South Korean team threw aside Portugal. And for good measure, disposed off Italy and Spain to reach the semifinals of the FIFA World Cup. All with the help of dubious umpiring decisions, insane home crowd support, and a physically offensive game (masterminded by that king-of-all-skunkfaces Guus Hiddink).

Picture courtesy: fifaworldcup.com

Cut to Hannover, 2006. Switzerland (2) - Korea Republic (0). A defeated and dejected team complains of bad refereeing against them in the final match of the group stage. How satisfying!!!

TAKE THAT, YOU SMALL-EYED SCUMBAGS!

Bollywood jokes...

2006-06-20T23:46:00.000+05:30

All in a lighter sense...

Q. Which company is keen to sign Anu Malik as brand ambassador?

A. Modi Xerox

Q. Apparently inspired by Harry Truman, the American President during WW II, what sign does Salman Khan have on his desk?

A. "The black buck stops here"

Q. Rakhi Sawant is planning to write a book. Guess what the title is?

A. "The Mika who sold his imandaari"

Q. Javed Jaffrey, while on a trip abroad, was invited to a ceremony in memory of Christoper Columbus and his historic voyage to the New World. He was asked to speak a few words. The smart cookie our Javed is, he said just one sentence. And the audience broke into a thundering applause. What did he say?

A. Yup, you guessed it right. "I don't the like the Indians!"

Q. During the filming of Munnabhai MBBS-3, (no successful movie stops with just a sequel these days), Arshad Warsi's character's daughter had to perform a pretty saucy item number. After the song was shot, the unit gave her a none-too-flattering nickname. What?

A. Open Sarkeet (Circuit)

"Trivia"...

1. Some titles considered by Rakesh Roshan before zeroing in on "Krrish" for his latest movie; ""Krrash", "Kaho Na Bekaar Hai", "Khoon Utha Bhaag", "Klu Klux Krrush".

2. Mallika Sherawat was initially apprehensive about endorsing a soft drink. She readily agreed when she came to know about the drink name: "7-UP"

3. The Bollywood movie which intrigued and haunted Bill Gates no end? Ram Gopal Verma's forthcoming "Nishabd". Apparently, he asked for the translation and someone told him, "without word(s)"

The two faces of irony

2006-06-14T07:28:00.000+05:30

The one that we are used to seeing is the mocking one. That which makes fun of us by delivering what was totally unexpected but not out of sync with events.

The other one is more mysterious. It comes in various guises and quite often, we mistake it for coincidence or even, providence.

What is the funda?

Sometimes, life gets a bit too much. There is suffering inside, suffering around us, suffering we get to hear, and we feel it. Some want to do something about it but can't. Some want to do something but "that" step is a lil too much for them to take. Some others like me are caught between these two and agonize over the state of limbo.

For a majority of last week, I was recovering from a bout of flu. Aside from congenital bronchitis. The pills were quite good in the sense that not only my return fairly steady but also, I was left quite exhausted and sleepless in weird hours. On one of these periods, I was wondering what is the point in feeling something if your efforts are not making any difference. Is there something that is preventing from being truly significant? I realized with a shudder that life maybe the most wonderful thing on earth but it is beset with mortality, causing the efforts to hit one hurdle or the other. I thought of "V for Vendetta" where my friend wrote a very good post about it. Then, I veered to Batman. The ultimate orphan. And "Batman Begins". Can guilt be transformed into such a rage? An overpowering drive to "atone" for the death of loved ones by killing crime, and not the criminal. And to those who saw BB, and feel a terrible sense of outrage over some appalling crimes that happen, what is wrong in Henri Ducard's methods of killing the perpetrator? The logic of "crimefighter being nobler than criminal and hence should not kill the criminal" sounds medal-worthy. But, if precedents are not set, what is the guarantee that a change in attitude will come about by just letting them go?

Now, how is this connected to the other face of irony? To the face of sin, indulging in spreading mayhem and chaos all along, is it not pleasantly ironic to see the good forgive it by not dealing in kind?

My other example will demonstrate this more.

For long, I have stayed away and immersed myself in things that I thought will ease the pain. It was tough, thoughts often went in that direction, but with effort, I managed to convince myself that I had passed that stage. So, I continued to slog myself during weekends, without any worries.

Destiny said, "Balls! Take this..."

And so, one such weekend proved that things are not that simple. There is just no way that you can tell yourself that "C'mon, it can't be that hard. Just concentrate and it will turn out alrite." Frankly speaking, life is not that simple sometimes.

Feelings are funny things. By the time you realize that its not a passing emotion, the moment is either already gone or the person is. The roller coaster ride continues even after the person has left and the void grips so hard, it is like an inescapable noose. Stolen glances only increase the heaviness and the burden of expectations (that horrible word again) remains.

There should be some kind of machine that can selectively erase the memories you don't want to stay. What use technology if it can't design a device like that?

Me, myself, and I

2006-06-02T15:54:00.000+05:30

Scene 1

A few days ago, I was chatting with a middle-aged woman who runs a home for orphans and children with special needs. Let’s call her R.

R: “You know, sometimes it’s so difficult for me to manage this place. Visitors come and barge in only to see the kids laze in the living room and the toilet doors wide open. I have been telling the staff to let the visitors only after they have spoken to me.”

Me: “Yes I understand."

R: “Should we not have some privacy too? After all, there are some teenage girls in the home. What about them? Should they not be well-protected?”

What else could I do than nod my (unkempt) head?

Scene 2

Australian football international Harry Kewell, who plays for English club Liverpool FC, married his girlfriend and TV star Sheree Murphy in a private ceremony 4 years ago. The wedding apparently cost about $200,000 and Kewell refused an offer of $250,000 for exclusive wedding pictures. Read more here about the intensely private Australian footballer…

Like these two, there is, I am sure, an abundance of incidents and anecdotes that demonstrate how people across all walks of life value their privacy and independence. Privacy is something that we cherish, even in the presence of our loved ones. And it is a delicate issue when it comes to celebrities. They want the attention and the adulation. But when it gets out of hand, they cry “invasion of privacy”.

How much strength does the argument have of the public claiming a right to know about the lives of those in the limelight?
When is the line crossed into the realm of intrusion?
And most importantly, does celebrity-hood (and the de facto use of claim of privacy) mean a mildly wicked privilege of getting away with something that is not possible by being a member of the public?

Mum, bhai, and behens

2006-05-22T17:46:00.000+05:30

This weekend, I had been to India's commercial capital to attend a meeting of our volunteer group's chapters. Lots of ppl have written reams and reams of how Mumbai is, what the pace of life is and all that. So, I will stick to my experience from the meet.

As the title hints, within the group, there were ppl from different age groups. There was a 27 year old research scholar from IIT-B, who has been nominated for 2006 Jonathan Mann award for Global Health and Human Rights. There was another on-campus PhD student with forthright views on our goals and perspectives. A young woman who sacrificed a pleasure trip to Italy so that she cud visit this meet (hats off to ya, Reema). And finally, a mother of a 2 year old who was equally astute and vastly experienced in initiating group activities.

Coming to the actual talks, it tells a lot when you have ppl arguing healthily and without trying to indulge in gamesmanship. Wavelengths tumble out and the argument becomes a whirlpool, sucking in even mild introverts like me. Voices fluctuated like electric currents, from soft whispers to half-bellows. Interspersed with the inevitable leg-pulling and countless cups of chai, worthwhile is an understatement to describe this.

Can't wait for the next one, yessir!!!

Final jinx

2006-05-18T10:11:00.000+05:30

I am utterly pissed off. No, actually hopping mad. Frustrated and angry.

Why?

For the fourth time in a row, I have missed the UEFA Champions' League Final due to a power cut. And if it was a blackout in my home last year and the year before, the cable operator was at the receiving end this time.

BESCOM sucks!

10 professions I would love to be in

2006-05-09T22:28:00.000+05:30

In no particular order of preference, and with whatever traveling I've done, here they're:

Music video Director
(Would do anything to visualize Hana’s eyes, Comparsa, almost every Enigma track...among so many others)
Driver of the Eurostar that connects London and Paris underwater
A shopkeeper on the Western coast of India
(preferably St.Mary’s Island or Goa)
Tour guide in the Italian Alps
(also means opportunities to catch Milan and Juve in action sometimes)
Player-Manager of a second division Brazilian football club
Mechanic in an F1 team
(don't mind Midland actually)
Cartoonist for a leading newspaper
(which is kinda realistic considering my best attempts at making portraits have often ended up being comical caricatures)
Miss India judge
(I desperately want to ask some wannabe, “If most beauty queens want to become Mother Theresa, can you explain why they land up in Bollywood?”) – then again, this is not a profession per se, so…
Sound engineer in a secluded studio surrounded by woods
A taxi driver along the French Riviera
(good food, the rich and the mighty, the Mediterranean, and the Monaco GP, of course)

If wishes were horses...

Huh...excuse me?

2006-05-05T23:17:00.000+05:30

Question: "And finally, do you have any regrets in life?"

Answer: "If only I had one..."

Family feuds...

2006-05-01T13:40:00.000+05:30

Nope, this post is not about some dumb saas-bahu cold war. Nor is it about "The Godfather". Its about two movies which have nothing else apart from family honor at stake.

Murder on the Orient Express

How I missed watching this awesome movie before, I never know. But I sure am glad to have seen it on a DVD.

The story is tight, the cast is spectacular (imagine a movie with Ingrid Bergman, Sean Connery, Jean Pierre Cassel - the Casanova French buccaneer in "Those magnificent men and their flying machines", Vanessa Redgrave - astonishingly beautiful, John Gielgud, Anthony Perkins, and Albert Finney as the pivotal Hercule Poirot), the professional performances, the breathtaking visuals as the train hurtles through the European countryside, everything about this movie is a real classic. There's even a mention of Shimoga in the movie. How interesting!

A MUST WATCH! (even if you have not read the book)

Underworld: Evolution

Since I missed the first one, I took some time to come to grips with the plot and the savage battle between the vampires and the werewolves a.k.a "Lycans". Fascinating visuals, a smouldering Kate Beckinsale, a unique hybrid creature Michael (played by Scott Speedman, who looks uncannily similar to Scott Stapp of Creed fame), all make for a really interesting fare. The bloods of the warring clans mix somewhere, setting up an intriguing plot for the third in the series. Some parts are Bollywood-ish but overall, stylish and slick.

4/5

Fifa Fo Fun

2006-04-28T15:18:00.000+05:30

The World Cup is just over a month away and most people would like to know what the odds of each team are. Here's a (not-too-serious) rundown of the major contenders (in alphabetical order):

ARGENTINA:
Lot of class, a heap of young, exciting players, a structured passing game is their trademark. But, so are internal ego clashes (Veron and Sorin apparently brawled after the Villarreal-Inter Milan match in Champions League) and selection headaches (Diego "God" Maradona is a fantastic once-in-a-lifetime footballer but perhaps he should realize that no one else can play like him.)

BRAZIL:
Ronaldinho, Robinho, Kaka, Adriano, Ronaldo, Lucio, Cafu.......nuff said. Absence of a solid goalie could be their undoing but who cares about defending when you have players who can sleepwalk, waltz, gallop, breeze and whatnot through most opposition defences?

CROATIA:
Being drawn in the same group as Brazil could be beneficial. For, you can meet them again only in the late stages of the tournament. If you progress from group, that is. But, on their own, they have good players who can deliver. Dado Prso (yeah, pronounced as the Hindi word for day-after-tomorrow) is a striker in the mould of the legendary Davor Suker. The others are usually named "First name Last name-ic" (pronounced as 'itch'). At the end of the tournament, you will be forgiven for wondering, "Which ic is which?". Ouch!

CZECH REPUBLIC:
Their current Fifa World ranking of #2 (behind...who else? Brazil) surprised many, including me. Heavily dependent on the Goliathesque Jan Koller (who stands at an eye-popping 2.02m), they also have players blessed with quick feet like captain PavelNedved, Milan Baros, and Tomas Rosicky. Brimming with good team spirit and innovation, be sure to "czech" them out in Group E where Italy is their main opponent.

ENGLAND:
The land where the game was born now sees a bunch of hotch-potch individuals looking to emulate the class of '66. From the mercurial talents of Wayne Rooney to the lame ball-missing midfield monkeys like Phil Neville, players have managed to get into the team that boasts the best domestic league in the world. For many, the reason why England can win on July 9 in Berlin is David Beckham. And for a certain few, he is the precise reason why England probably won't make it to that day.

FRANCE:
The Les Bleus have been in the blues since their utterly forgettable showing four years ago in Korea/Japan. Coupled with an inconsistent qualifying and captain Zinedine Zidane's decision to quit, they could very well be left with red faces and white flags at the end of this year's campaign. But in Thierry Henry and David Trezeguet, they have proven striking talent and could yet make it. As long as they score goals for their country, not just for their clubs.

GERMANY:
When a team is being coached by someone who was a better diver than Greg Louganis during his playing days, it is strange to see it depend on a midfielder to get the goals. A lot is being asked of Michael Ballack this summer and goals is not the only question. With a rumored transfer to Chelsea that could make him the world's richest player (wrt earning/week), Ballack has to take a huge burden of the hosts' expectations on his powerful shoulders.

ITALY:
Having demolished Germany in a friendly some weeks ago with consummate ease, the confident Italians have just one worry on their hands: the fitness of their injured talisman, striker-midfielder Francesco Totti. With him in the ranks, their balance assumes deadly proportions, since they are traditionally a defence-minded unit. Keen to make amends for an early exit four years ago, they could well meet with the French in the semis. A match that could see either "Arrivederci" or "Merci".

NETHERLANDS:
Along with Spain, they are the big underachievers in international football. Endowed with great talent, but with the mental strength of a mosquito, a team that is easy on the eye and frustrating to the heart at the same time. Quite capable of topping their group comprising Argentina, Ivory Coast, and Serbia-Montenegro, quite capable of coming last too.

PORTUGAL:
A team of gifted individuals again, relied a lot on home crowd support to reach the finals of Euro 2004. Have the potential to reach the semis but a lot will depend on Figo and Ronaldo as the rest of the squad don't have much experience at this level. Coached by Scolari who guided Brazil to the pinnacle 4 years ago, the man has gone on record saying, "The beautiful game is dead and buried. It is now history." Followers hope not.

SPAIN:
If there's a team which matches the Netherlands in the "flatter-to-deceive" department, it is Spain. Their domestic league is arguably the most competitive in the world, their clubs have an enviable record in Europe and yet, Spain have almost nothing to show for in the world stage. Is it a coincidence that an "S" precedes the word "pain" in their Anglic version of the name?

U.S.A:
Like the Czechs, the USA has a remarkably good ranking (#3). No household names, and yet, they went as far as the quarters 4 years ago and will be looking to go one better this time. In a group with 2 tough European opponents in the Czechs and the Italians, it will take some doing just to be runner-up in the group, leave alone top it. But then, no team played to prediction in Korea/Japan 4 years ago, so take this with a pinch of Utah salt.

There you have it. Hope this helped..:)

Tagged - from C'est what?

2006-04-26T09:57:00.000+05:30

Ma chance, mon ami..:)

Five people on my shit list:
1. David Beckham
2. Anu Malik
3. Arvind Ratnam (those from RVCE will know who he is)
4. Aishwarya Rai (surprised?)
5. Manu Sharma, Bitti Mohanty...all those who treat women as playthings. BASTARDS!!!

Close brushes with death/danger:
A tough one, this.

1. I vaguely remember falling down, as a school boy, when I tried to get onto a fast-running bus. Not sure what happened next.
2. On another occasion, on a trip to Coorg with my Dad and his friends and respective families in 1989, the Matador van we were going in suffered a brake failure on the way down from the top of a hill. We somehow managed to avoid a steep drop and rammed straight to a mud hill.
3. As a kid, I was told that I jumped into a 5' tank and lay submerged for about a minute or so.

Five preferable modes of suicide:
Not sure if I am ready to commit suicide, but if I have to die, it will be on the day I know the reason for my living is no longer valid.

Five guilty pleasures:
1. Jumping the red signal when I am traveling at 60kph.
2. Goofing off in the face of deadlines. (I do this too, Harry..:P)
3. An occasional beer. Waitaminit, I had port wine at my friend's place on Saturday. And it was nice..MMMMM!!!
4. Ransacking the office cookie jar for chocolate chip cookies. (They have stopped loading it now. Only dull butterscotch cookies, DAMMIT!)
5. Surreptitiously watch MTV Grind on the pretext of watching late night football (if the match gets too boring, of course).

Five things you never want to forget:
1. My first paycheck.
2. The first time I played football (which incidentally was with a stone and I promptly aimed a freekick at the shins of some boy sitting and watching us play)
3. The innocence and honesty of little children.
4. Surprisingly for an Indian, outsourcing (which happens to be my biggest and worst enemy).
5. The day my lil sister was born.

Five things you wish to forget:
If I wanted to forget them, why would I be mentioning them here?

Five exotic dishes you've tried:
I never play favorites with food. It might be counter-productive..:D

Five loves of your life (not in order):
Children, mom, sports, music, and the 5^th one is hopefully on the way... :D

Strangest Dream:
Watching a gigantic aircraft (far bigger than A380) land at some airport swathed in orange lights, raise huge plumes of dust, and take off without stopping.

Five most valued possessions:
Life, talent, education, sense of humor, privacy

Five favorite superheroes:
1. Batman
2. Kalpana Chawla
3. The Question
4. Ayrton Senna
5. Vishal Talreja (well and truly on his way to become my hero)

Shrink and Lucid... s'il vous plait.

Simran

2006-04-22T23:46:00.000+05:30

Simran
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

And her works...

Simran's sketch 1
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

Simran's sketch 2
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

Simran's sketch 3
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

8 years old. Very quiet. Too shy to even face the camera. And that made her even more adorable...

Fan-attack

2006-04-14T00:04:00.000+05:30

It all started yesterday at around 2:30 PM IST, when the news came in. I did a quick search online and was initially stunned to find that Dr.Rajkumar was no more. Then, it turned to apprehension and by 6, most of us in the office were on tenterhooks given Bangalore's penchant for blowing its top at the slightest provocation (the kidnapping incident of 2000 and the more ghastly Cauvery riots being forgettable precedents).

I left office at close to 7 and on the way home, saw a burnt public transport bus towed by a truck. A bike with 3 people on it screamed past with the Karnataka flag. I reached home safe and switched on the TV. The channels were blaring the truth.

Thursday was all-hell-break-loose day. Shocking scenes of cops being chased down and being pummelled by goons on TV. Film personalities alternating between poetic eulogies interspersed with emotional outbursts and pleas to rioting fans to maintain calm and order. One politician almost compounded a toxic situation by suggesting that the cremation was being done one day too soon. 5 people dead, mourning the death of a matinee idol. Public life hit. Buses torched. Cars overturned and smoking like in the potboilers.

In the evening, I ventured out. Went to a friend's place as there was nothing else on TV. We went to a half-open general provisions store to buy something and a traffic cop came to the shop. I noticed that I had parked my bike below a "No Parking" sign. I was expecting a minor rebuff. Whether it was my imagination or it was real, I will never know. The cop bought something at the stores, and left on his bike in a tearing hurry. I was disturbed.

Forget the image, Bangalore's soul is now sold to the devil. By the people failing miserably to respect a man who gave so much to cinema and honor his immense contribution but instead, ensured that his death anniversary will be very painful for a lot of people for years to come.

Is this the city I once lived and loved?

Black bucks and black sheep

2006-04-11T10:24:00.000+05:30

Finally, it has happened. No, not Bangladesh sending Australia on a leather hunt. Not Jagmohan Dalmiya getting a taste of his own medicine either.

It is Salman Khan getting jailed for his misdemeanours in Rajasthan.

What is the most irksome about this new development is Suniel Shetty's comment. He has said "Celebrities are being targeted" or something to that effect.

Load of stinking bull, Mr. Shetty. Salman Khan may be a star, but he is, first and foremost, a citizen of this republic. And there are rules that are the same for everyone, no matter what your social status is. You run a car over some innocent pedestrians, you have to pay for it. You kill a rare breed of species, you pay the price. Celebs thrive on the positive attention, but when controversy arrives, they chicken out and pass deplorable comments like this. And given the enormous reach that Bollywood has, speaking out in solidarity for a fellow entertainer might have been the best option but it smacks of contempt to the judicial system of our country.

And, apparently, money is the most important thing for certain people. Read this...

Judge-mental

2006-04-06T10:58:00.000+05:30

I was reading a mail from my colleague about which software companies are safe to work for and which ones don't think twice before firing people. The names mentioned were jaw-dropping and the rationale behind the classification, even more incredulous. Just because XYZ Software Solutions bagged a multimillion dollar worth project from another giant, does it mean that your job is secure? And on the other hand, just because the top brass of a company decided to downsize the workforce in some location, does it mean that your job is on the line as well?

How come we jump to conclusions so easily? Why do we never hesitate to judge people, corporations, organizations etc? And for God's sake, why this damned craze for the software field?

I wonder if those with non-software jobs are more measured in their outlook and opinions.

Someday at Hyderabad...

2006-04-03T16:28:00.000+05:30

Day 1 - 31^st March 06:

Fended off over-enthu (p)rick guys at the bus-station. Managed to make it to friend’s house. The guy is a gem. He went to office late because I wasn’t sure of reaching his place. Thanks, Barry. Watched “Those magnificent men and their flying machines” on video. Thought of watching “The day of the jackal” but was too tired and fell asleep.

Went to watch “Malamaal weekly” at Prasad’s Multiplex with Barry. The best thing about the multiplex was the lack of crowd for a late night Friday movie. Forum, at this time, will be bursting at the seams. There was the odd family out for the night dinner+movie. The tickets were unbelievably cheap (60 bucks, really). The movie was good, a cpl of chicks worth a second look, the drive back even better, and fell asleep amid discussions at 3 AM about our group and my purpose of the visit.

Day 2 - 1^st April 06:

Hyd is hot and a lil bit humid. But the roads..my God. They are simply fantastic. And the motorists didn't seem to suffer from the touchy road rage that we see here everyday. No frenzied scream of "Nimmayyan" or "Baddimagne"! How nice. I now have a fond dream of blasting through the smooth streets on a fast car. Someday.

Also met Peeves at ISB. Man, what an amazing campus! The best of whatever is available there and there’s accommodation even for married couples with kids. How about that? This day also saw Shahzad arrive. We had started discussing a few things before we met up with the Hydie gang at 6. After meeting up with Hyd chapter came back and had dinner at Farmaaish. Dingy and the food not great either. Returned home and promptly went to a disco some 20 km from the apartment, Ecstasy. 7 others joined us on the way and boy, did we have fun that night. Like true filthy peepers, we caught a couple making out in an Innova and another by the bar counter. Returned home at 4 and instantly dozed off.

Day 3 - 2^nd April 2006:

Woke up at 8 and left for our first stopover. Met the guys and had a nice time with the prankish young girls (aged around 6-7, ye doubting Thomases). Survived a big lecture from the Sister and reached the second of our stops. The place didn’t look as bad as it was made out to be. But, something indeed did not seem right. Maybe, my cynical instincts kicking in, I suppose.

Afterwards, met a cpl of other friends who couldn’t make it to the visit. Discussed further important things with them.

Left Hydie at 7 15. Nice memories. I am sure to return. Someday.

Impressions

2006-03-23T00:13:00.000+05:30

An aging cowboy, with half-open eyes and a drawl that's so obscenely overdone has managed to create quite a rage among the people I know. Eat this:

Guy 1 (in a group mail): "I the got the promoted to Business Analyst at the my office. I the very happy about it."

Guy 2 (in reply): "I the like it a lot, XXXXXXX (nickname blocked not on request but keeping public sentiments in mind). You the have the dum to make it. When it is the treat that you the give me?"

Getting it? No? Ok, lemme try again.

Me: "You know? I am beginning to think that its like a trilogy."

Girl 1: "Eggjaktly!!!"

Me - ROTFLMAO...

Getting there?

Guy 3 has this as his email signature.

"Ghosts of the kicks...not listening to the talks!!!"

Javed Jaffrey may never be remembered for another role in his life. As the comically menacing Crocodile Dundee in Salaam Namaste, he has started a cult following which most main heroes only dream of. Most people are already wondering if he was bigger than the chartbusting music in that movie and deserves an award for such memorable acting.

EGGJAKTLY!!!

A tale of two books

2006-03-20T23:56:00.000+05:30

#1

I will bet the last dollar that this book was written for the Asians. Who on hell would write a book on the Nandan Nilekanis, and how Dalian is overtaking Shanghai in the software superstakes? Bill Gates? Yeah, he's there too. You can even check out the names that Tommy Friedman uses in his book. Neat! And the whopper? I didnt have to pay a dime for it. Borrowed it from my buddy who is a real dude in writing articles. Yo man...cool, ain't it!!!

The second of them

I daresay, the Brits have a sense of the English word that is a mark aside from that of the rest of the world. Upon my soul, this book is a stirring tale of murder, blackmail, rural intrigue, and the evergreen ingenuity of Monsieur Hercule Poirot. It would be most unfortunate if you were to miss the subtle innuendoes and peccadilloes that Miss Christie imposes in her likeable detective. His tact in handling delicate matters of the filial nature is truly admirable. Indeed, the legend of Poirot continues to gather another student of the inimitable art.

The blessed and the not-so-blessed...

2006-03-19T21:43:00.000+05:30

Sometime last week, I was talking to my friend from Hyderabad in Yahoo. She revealed that sometimes being popular is not always a gift. Set me thinking. What of those who cannot get the attention they deserve? The opportunities unseen and denied? A life bereft of avenues that come their way if only a little effort is made on their behalf?

Omkar Nisal is one such person in Pune who is trying to make a difference. What he does can be read here and also here.

And I say, not every hero gets his due....

"Super Sunday" or "Here we go" (again)

2006-03-13T23:20:00.000+05:30

So go the titles of ESPN's coverage of the English Premier League. Arsenal dished out a masterclass in finishing to a hopelessly misfiring Liverpool side. The Gunners were simply rampant and their moves, nothing short of silky. And Cesc Fabregas is a splendid talent. What vision the kid has!

Day-Jaw-Who: Steven Gerrard..for a howler of a backpass that was reminiscent of his blunder against France in Euro 2004.

After the season opening race in Bahrain, the show host remarked that Kimi Raikkonen must be sick n tired of being told that he's finished a race and not won it. Well, if he is indeed nonplussed at it, he didn't show it at the post-race interview. Fighting back from the rear of the grid and finishing 3rd in a McLaren that looks distinctly similar to the Midland, he showed his trademark ice-cool composure under pressure. When will gathering winner's trophies become another trademark of his?

Day-Jaw-Who: Kimi "Gangway" Raikkonen.

Finally, THE MATCH. A slew of records. A barrage of boundaries that left the bowlers' community crying for gangrape. And on a batting belter that produced 872 runs in a ball short of 100 overs, Nathan Bracken's 5-67 deserves something more than a polite round of applause. The poor guy will never forget his botched dolly (the damage was probably already done) off Gibbs but isn't it poetic justice that the "dropper" became the "dropped"?

Day-Jaw-Who: All the belaboured bowlers and of course, Herschelle Hermann Gibbs.

Of commentators' curse and heights of irony

2006-03-09T11:05:00.000+05:30

The commentators' curse is the footballing equivalent of "I-spoke-too-soon" syndrome. So, a few days back, I gave a lecture mail to someone who was a fellow member of a yahoo group on how forwarded mails can initiate spamming in a group. And bingo..what happens?

I start spamming the group myself!!!

As for the heights of irony, few things can match wracking brains for nearly an hour trying to recall a word that begins with "V" and means easily evaporable.

The word is Volatile.

You know summer is almost there when...

2006-03-01T23:10:00.000+05:30

...ur socks stink worse than neighborhood trash dumps.

...u start using 2 deos a fortnight instead of one.

...a glass of water is probably more helpful than a pint of beer.

...u start getting mouth ulcers (I am currently struggling with 3 humongous ones..MMPPPFFGHH).

...power goes every now and then (How can they call it load shedding when some places dont even have power? Why cant they transfer it there?).

...men loosen the second button on their shirts...EWW

...college girls start wearing knee-length skirts...The antidote.

...it becomes a really tough decision to make whether to raise the windows of a Santro owned by friend and use the AC (thus pay more for petrol) or roll them down and endure periodic blasts of hot air at 100kph (which is what we did on Sunday to Mysore).

Gunners fire one up

2006-02-22T10:21:00.000+05:30

What is Real Madrid's new nickname after their abysmal show against Arsenal on Tuesday, Feb 21st?

LOS PATHETICOS!!!

I claim originality for this one. Humbly.

Powered by genius, driven by humility

2006-02-18T08:06:00.000+05:30

Yup, the slogan looks very familiar but it suits these 2 just fine.

Photo courtesy: www.lazygeek.net

You will get all the stats about him in his webpage. But what it doesn't mention is how ridiculously simple he makes it look. Making music, I mean. I sometimes mistake that veil of modesty cloaking the volcanic talent as the only thing required to make music. And how stupid a mistake that is. He won a National Award for his first film at 23 when most of us were either clueless as to what we shud be doing with our life or working away or both. And yet he says in response to a question ("Why is it that you make the best music for Mani Ratnam and not so good for others?"), "I may have something inside me. It is upto the director to bring it out. It depends on how it is brought out!!!"

Photo courtesy: www.sportstaronnet.com/

Pilloried for slow batting. Shunted around like a rogue bogie in the batting order. Panned for no fault of his over the Saurav Ganguly sob story (how long is it gonna take Bangaloreans to make incendiary statements on television? Or even request Malashri or Jayamala to slam all and sundry?). And Bob Woolmer is such a numbskull-who-thinks-he-is-a-schemer that he thought it would be smart to spin Dravid's selfless decision to open the batting in the recent Test series as exposing himself to the new ball and a new weakness. Mr. Woolmer, if you can shut that stinking, holier-than-thou mouth in your face and learn to manage brattish bowlers and self-centric batsmen, we fans would be really grateful!

Yes, this post has nothing new in terms of information. It is what everyone knows about these 2 shining beacons of our country. And that, in itself, is a tribute to the overwhelming, simplistic appeal that they are blessed with.

Fact is Dr.Jekyll and fiction, Mr.Hyde

2006-02-15T23:06:00.000+05:30

Today, at work, one of my colleagues was ribbing the business development manager by calling him "call center worker". She went on to declare that she hated call centers.

A rush of memories.

Good. Bad. But, mostly unforgettable.

I would love to go back and make a fresh start. Not that I miss it. On the contrary, rectify some idiotic blunders.

But, the fact remains I cannot escape the past.

Now, you see the analogy.

Pj to sign off..

What is common to Elmer Fudd and Gen. Pervez Musharraf?

Both like long hair (hare).

At the prize distibution of 3rd PAK-IND match on Monday, Musharraf categorically instructed Dhoni to retain his long locks inspite of placards appealing to him to do the opposite.

This and that...

2006-02-07T21:58:00.000+05:30

Can you believe that the above picture was forwarded to me by my ex-colleague who got it from his friend with the subj line: "Fwd: Unbelievable satellite photo of tsunami"?

And this guy who fwd it to my friend works at CTS. Now, come on, u nincompoop of a techie. Are you so dumb that you can't think for a moment that tsunamis are not visible on the earth's surface, let alone be so gigantic enough to be photographed like this from a satellite? Maybe the fault is not with you. Whoever hired you and taught you to send mails through Outlook should be sent for a brain scan or whatever.

At the other end of the intellect spectrum, we have, ladies and gentlemen, Rakeysh Omprakash Mehra (I reckon I got the spelling right, what with Bollywood's peculiar fetish for numerological nomenclature). There was such a big hype about Aks when it was released 5 years ago, some people even justified its failure as being too smart for audiences. Now, I know why this guy is called so intelligent.

Rang De Basanti is like cancer. Or vodka. Or love. It grows on you. From having slight doubts about certain members being miscast (Aamir, I thought at first, hardly exuded the characteristic masculinity for a Punjabi male), to constantly recollect scenes of carefree reverie and intense drama, while driving or having lunch with colleagues or even typing some nondescript global function. Aside from the amazing songs, the feel of the movie is such that you tend to keep telling yourself: "Ah, so this is why Aamir chose to do this movie!" and "The end was fair and logical". And "Khalbali" and "Roobaroo" are mesmerisingly beautiful. Or beautifully mesmerising. I don't care, I'm bewitched!

Speaking of attention, I believe that this post deserves an award for being a very poignant and heartfelt one. Bravo and thanks for making me realize that I am not alone when I feel lonely. You have been blogrolled..:)

Some things I learnt over the weekend:

2006-02-05T22:52:00.000+05:30

This post is not gonna be one of my nonsense kinds...:P

Working with kids is a daunting energy challenge, work out or not. You gotta watch what you say. You gotta do what the kids love to do. You gotta sense which kid is bored of a game and which kid wants to continue....
Learning to work with kids is a completely AWESOME and EYE OPENING experience. Time flies so fast when you learn the ropes and the attitude undergoes a minor makeover!
Prejudices are built upon peer pressures, innermost heartfelt expectations, and others' validations.
It feels really great to watch a movie about happy-go-lucky buffoons with 8 similar characters and identify yourself with them. The music was mind-blowing: background score ekdum first-class, "Lose Control" unbelievably catchy. And in a movie of changing personae, Siddarth Narayan takes the cake for essaying the incurable cynic-turned-parent killer. But I just can't believe if this is true.
Chicken Steak at Shezan on Lavelle Road is OUTASITE!!! YUMMITY YUMMITY YUMMMM!!!

Zinda

2006-01-22T18:56:00.000+05:30

Thriller or action, difficult to brand. But engrossing. For one reason only.

SANJAY DUTT.

Tailor made by Sanjay Gupta for him. For the most part, he spits fire in his dialogues. The eyes change from twinkling trinkets in his wife's company to the vengeful black holes seeking his destroyer. The rest of the cast is pedestrian and the motive for the revenge and the counter-badla, though far-fetched, is well shot. Aided by a cool background score (the popular Zinda song coming on music channels these days), a predominantly darkish blue camera tone throughout, and rightly set in seedy Bangkok, the movie is mostly high-jinks violence and worth the ticket price. Haven't seen Kalyug yet but I reckon the two are worthy of a comparison.

4/5

What do you get when...

2006-01-12T16:13:00.000+05:30

...you cross a Hollywood lothario with an utterly pissed off alien trying to reach the CM of Namma Bengalooru?

A. Callin' Barrell

Don't tear your hair out. The hairdresser/salon assistant is being paid for that...:D

Do hazaar punch..sorry paanch

2005-12-29T19:08:00.000+05:30

JANUARY

Wonder what this year has in store.

FEBRUARY

Boss marries. Sting arrives. Office changes location. MG Road....hoo boy!

MARCH

Law of alcoholic anger alleviation: The amount of liquor consumed is directly proportional to the increase in workload at the office.

APRIL

My temper flares some more everywhere. Summer heat is only a secondary reason.

MAY

Joe Sat comes and goes. 2 colleagues get married. Get pay hike (now I am ready to quit!). Miss Liverpool's stunning comeback against Milan. Power outage, what else?

JUNE

2 super close buddies tie the knot. Work has tied me to a jail. No escape in sight. Had enough of blogging.

JULY

Get the ticket at home for drinking. Quit for good. (don't even touch beer now!)

AUGUST

Complete one year at the office. Seems like a millennium. Football season starts. An idol leaves for greener pastures (well, actually, blue and black are the more correct colors). Returned to blogging.

SEPTEMBER

25. And bedridden due to illness on the day. DAMN!!! Quit work. Peace and restlessness (some things are best left unexplained).

OCTOBER

Easily the worst month. Not only because of the nonstop rains.

NOVEMBER

The CAT is out of the bag and on a hot tin roof!

DECEMBER

Trying hard to recall memories. Only forgettable ones remain while the better ones are infuriatingly elusive.

And so, I believe...

LIFE IS A LIE. WHAT THE "F"!!!

WISHING ALL THE READERS OF THIS BLOG, A VERY HAPPY 2006

PS: Just saw a mail wishing an old schoolmate birthday thru an egroup. "Belted wishes" goes the greeting...no less!

For whom the bells "poll"?

2005-12-21T22:16:00.000+05:30

End of the year usually sees a rash of surveys. The best Bollywood film. The worst month in terms of rainfall. The first this. The last that. So what happens?

NDTV jumps into the party. They exhort viewers to put their already-fatigued fingers on the mobile keypads and send in votes for the Indian of the Year.

Ok, a few deserve to be there. Sania Mirza, Narayana Murthy (mutters of disapproval, the man deserves it. Cmon), and of course, S. Manjunath (my vote, if my aching thumb will allow me, will go for him).

Some maybe got through due to circumstances. Nitish Kumar, Manmohan Singh, Sachin Tendulkar (no other situation could have so many people discuss lateral epicondylitis with the confidence of a veteran physician).

But I simply can't figure out why the bloody, freakin hell was Aishwarya Rai included in the list? How can u be nominated for doing nothing apart from cavorting with the high and mighty of Hollywood? By the same token, Mallika Sherawat should have been nominated. "Myth" or not, she helps me get fit. My blood circulation drastically improves!

On a serious note, I just received a mail from my friend saying India has won the World Cup.

EH? WORLD CUP?? INDIA????

Well, yes. The Cricket World Cup for the orally and the aurally challenged. So what if we were the hosts? I searched all over for it and most unbelievably, even Cricinfo didn't have a single piece of news on it. And we pride ourselves as a cricket-crazy nation.

Why wasn't this team nominated? Where is the justice?

Adidas Football

2005-12-21T08:43:00.000+05:30

Just one word for this....

AWESOME!!!

Dizzy shuns

2005-12-13T11:07:00.000+05:30

One difficult move that I made of late was to leave A, try my luck with B and wait for a response, all the while hoping for a call from C.

Huh????

Girlfriends? ME??? What a joke!!!

A is my ex-company, B is an IT giant, and C, a company whose line of work is mouthwateringly enticing.

Brains in the fridge, bodies in the oven

2005-12-10T14:32:00.000+05:30

So said Bob Woolmer before the cricket World Cup in 2003. Implying that teams with players who had minds as cool as ice and fitness as flexible as hot cheese would go far. Whether my beloved Seleção de Europeu are following the same funda for Germany '06, I have no clue. But I do hope that they don't flatter to deceive like they did 3 years ago.

Other teams that I would like to see do really well...

Czech Republic (always liked their enterprising style)

Netherlands (on paper, the only team capable of beating Brazil)

Trinidad and Tobago (my gut feeling says they could be the nemesis of a few big teams)

Argentina (if there's any team which can win the WC with their second-string squad, its them)

Italy (if Maldini returns)

And the teams that I like to see go out early...

France (a clutch of egoistic superstars)

Korea (OOOOOHH....vengeance for dumping Portugal, Spain, and Italy out in '02)

Germany (I still hate their robotic, defensive style)

and of course, how can I forget?

England (Beckham, Eriksson, Rooney, Ferdinand - a bunch of overrated, sore losers)

Fictional conversation between Beckham and Eriksson during a training session.

E: "Hey Becks, there's a cricket coach who has said: 'The key to winning a major tournament like the World Cup is to have brains in the fridge, bodies in the oven'. Do you know what it means?"

B: "I dunno. Are we supposed to eat frozen human brain and bodies?"

E: "No, you idiot. It means that if your team has fit players whose minds are cool, it can win the tournament."

B (rather dimly): "Oh....yeah?"

Somewhere nearby, Frank Lampard wisecracks to Steven Gerrard.

"Don't worry. No fridge is necessary for a captain who was born without any brains and has more tattoos and lipstick marks in his body than skin!!!"

Too good...

2005-12-07T16:41:00.000+05:30

Labour Help...OTC!!!
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

The pic says it all. LOL!!!

Funny relationships

2005-12-04T09:06:00.000+05:30

Anup
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

Anup is about 6' 2" tall. Built like a boxer. As old as I am (infact, born in Sep like me). Works as a Service Manager in a showroom for Audi cars in Accra, GHANA. My contemporary from RVCE ('02 batch, Mechanical Engg). Has a brooding body language. But a huge hearty laugh also.

And I am his uncle!

3 years ago, my cousin Srinivas fell in love with Anup's mom's youngest sister and married her, thus making Anup, my distant nephew.

I am wondering whether its worth the risk to throw my weight around with him (pun not intended, especially when I am 68 kilos compared to his 100+ kilo bulk).

Sir, thinnakke enide?

2005-12-02T08:20:00.000+05:30

Last nite, I had dinner with Rohit, Madwa, Raj, and Abhi (all my college classmates) at the Food Street, V.V. Puram (South Bangaloreans and those who are natural foodies will know where it is). We stopped over at a chat shop and noticed the menu which had some items like this:

* GAD BUB
(sounds like a character from the Police Academy series)

* CHOCO BAA
(must be a sheep speciality)

* VERI STRAWBERI
(full marks for the rhyme)

* DHAI PURI
(I was rather pissed off cos this was not for Rs. 2.50 like we assumed, it was 10 bucks)

and the one that cracked all of us up....

* CHICKOO BLAST

Now, this is what I call a dynamite juice!!!

Fwd: The Madrasi in Minneapolis

2005-11-28T14:21:00.000+05:30

Swami, a Madrasi migrated to America, and moved into an American neighborhood. His American neighbor next door went to wish him welcome. He was shocked to see Swami in his nice backyard chasing ten chickens around like mad.

"Must be a South Indian custom," he thought to himself.

Deciding he could put off the welcome till a later date, he went home. The next day, he decided he was going to welcome his neighbor again. When he looked through his window, he saw Swami urinate into a cup and drink it.

"Must be a South Indian custom," he thought to himself again.

Deciding he could put off the welcome till tomorrow, he went on with other stuff. The third day, he was determined to welcome his neighbor. At his gate, he saw Swami with his ear pressed against a cow's big fat butt. Seeing this, he became angry and went up to him.

"I'm sorry sir, I did want to wish you a warm welcome, but I cannot stand your crazy South Indian customs," he yelled. The neighbor looked confused and answered.

"Sorry sir, I think you are mistaken. These are actually American customs. I was told that in order to be a true American, you have to chase chicks, get piss drunk, and listen to bullshit!!!"

"Where on heaven is the Alpha Centauri?"

2005-11-21T22:05:00.000+05:30

Stargazers
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

Sunday dinner. Raj and Rohit discussing choice of starters to go down with the beer at the Holiday Village off Kanakpura Road.

Morning shitness...

2005-11-11T08:03:00.000+05:30

There was a man named Suppu
Whose brain was totally faltu
One fine evening, he decided
To visit his friend uninvited
And bug him through and through

His friend's name was Kariya
Now, don't ask me "Really-aa?"
He was sleeping when Suppu knocked
The talk that followed barely rocked
It wasn't long before they said "Cya"

He came home and saw the telly
Heard the old growl in his belly
Had dinner and went to bed at eleven
Lost sleep just before seven
His thoughts all in a melee

Coffee serves to sting his tongue
A whiff of fresh air for the lungs
Dreams arise amidst a dying brother
Floating in a ship with no rudder
Writing limericks that are purely dung

Sakharam Binder

2005-11-09T08:59:00.000+05:30

Effective duration is close to 2hr 15min which makes it the longest play I've watched so far.

The characters are few; Sakharam, his friend Dawood, Latchmi (Sakharam's 6th maid), Champa (the 7th maid), and Champa's husband.

The dialogues are replete with saala/saali, haram zyaada/haram zyaadi, namard, kechua and so on. The audience's reaction can be guessed.

Even though I am not kicked about theater (and never will be), it was interesting to see the perspective about drama of a troupe whose performance I haven't seen before. For example, the end was so abrupt that I thought it was like a wet cracker going off but methinks there's something in the way Latchmi digs the grave after Sakharam's gory deed. And why was the lighting so wierd? Orange for dusk indoors???

IMO, the highlight of the play is the scene where Champa goes on a kicking spree on her husband with Sakharam watching mutely and Dawood cringing in fright at each blow. The dialogue delivery before and during this scene is really good.

2/5

PS: I absolutely detest pompous assholes who misuse their social standing and age to demand tea out of turn at Prakash Cafe. As Vaish cursed, I hope they get a big scald on their bums!

Great (foot)balls of fire

2005-11-08T13:16:00.000+05:30

Q. What is the difference between Rooney and Ronaldinho?

A. The first can't help putting his foot in his mouth and the second can't help making others want to put their mouths to his feet (i.e, kiss it in reverence).

Aside from such a frivolous comparison, both symbolize their country's approach to football. While the temperamental Rooney seems to suffer from "the-ref-is-out-to-book-me-tonite" syndrome eternally, Ronaldinho plays football as though sex can be the most boring thing in the world (Marat Safin and Ronaldinho's countryman and idol Ronaldo have some interesting comments in this regard).

While England has never failed to produce players of good quality, the truth remains that Brazil churns them out with such unbelievable frequency and quality that only a fraction go on to realize their dream of plying their trade in Europe and winning the World Cup with the Seleção. Any (and I mean, any) club in Europe's leading leagues has atleast one Brazilian in the squad. Staggering!

But still, I would looooove to see them win next year.

Monsoon Shredding...

2005-10-25T11:14:00.000+05:30

...Hosur Road (and Bangalore) on the morning of October 24, 2005.

Such is the power of water
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

2-wheelers were the hardest hit
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

Is this Venice?
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

Water water everywhere, not a drop to drink
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

Devru Kansbitta

2005-10-14T18:01:00.000+05:30

Kannada slang
Literal meaning: "God appeared"
Usage: In situations where there is absolutely no hope, marked by fear of the worst

Example:

"Maga, naanu avathu exam paper nodthini, devru kaansbitta lo. Yentha loafer paper set maadirbeku antha ankonde gotha?"

"Dude, when I went through the exam paper, I lost all hope. I was wondering which jerk set the paper."

Thursday was when I got the same sensation. Jumped into the water for surfing with full josh near Mysore, and promptly lost balance after sometime and fell down. Since I don't know swimming and the water looked dangerously oceanic blue, I flopped around miserably and went under for a fraction of a sec. And that's when devru kansbitta for me....

But overall, an experience that brought a lot of entertainment for the guys on the shore and something that I will do again, albeit having learnt swimming.

Limits of biting sarcasm...

2005-10-04T22:46:00.000+05:30

With due respect to Chennaites, I found this funny yet lil too imaginative for comfort...

Shadows in the dark

2005-10-01T09:16:00.000+05:30

Watched this play last nite with friends whom I hadn't met for a while and thoroughly enjoyed it. Would even say that it was the most entertaining one that I have seen in RS so far.

The pluses were many. Slick direction, fabulous performances (the producer, the Havaldar, and the citizen were such meaty roles), just about enough duration to make it long without being boring, and pretty good sets. And on top of them, 2 friends who I know quite well were acting in it and both did a super job. Good on you, Priya and Rohit!!!

And post-show, sumptuous Egg Biryani preceded by steaming Kalmi Kababs at a nearby restaurant was the icing on an already-satisfying cake.

Nonsense posts to continue from the next...:D

FC Internazionale Latin Americano?

2005-09-29T12:29:00.000+05:30

Harry and Shom, clarify this for me.

Last night, when Inter played Rangers in an empty San Siro, Inter made 3 substitutions in the second half.

Alvaro Recoba (URU) ON

Obafemi Martins (NIG) OFF

Ze Maria (BRA) ON
Luis Figo (POR) OFF

Kily Gonzalez (ARG) ON
Santi Solari (ARG) OFF

With this, excluding Pierre Wome, the Cameroon defender, and the Italian thug, Marco Materazzi, the rest of Inter players were from either Brazil (Ze Maria, Julio Cesar), Argentina (Gonzalez, Cambiasso, Cruz, Samuel), Chile (Pizzarro), Colombia (Cordoba), or Uruguay (Recoba) . Aren't there restrictions on the number of non-EU players a club can field in the Champions' League?

Pj for the day...

2005-09-27T07:12:00.000+05:30

Q. What is common to Greg Chappell and voracious beer drinkers?

A. Leak problems.

Office memories

2005-09-26T00:26:00.000+05:30

Some anecdotes from the days gone by...

1. Mail requesting application test:

"Hello ABC,

Plees chick the file apploded to....

Sourcecontrol path founded at....

This has to rech the cilnt on....

Regrads,

XYZ"

2. Mail from a FEMALE MARRIED colleague:

A priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A leading local politician and member of the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and give a little speech at the dinner. He was delayed so the priest decided to say his own few words while they waited.

"I got my first impression of the parish from the first confession I heard here. I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first person who entered my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and, when stopped by the police, had almost murdered the officer. He had stolen money from his parents, embezzled from his place of business, had an affair with his boss's wife, taken illegal drugs. I was appalled. But as the days went on I knew that my people were not all like that and I had, indeed, come to a fine parish full of good and loving people."

Just as the priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately walked over to the dais and began to make the presentation giving his talk.

"I'll never forget the first day our parish priest arrived." said the politician. "In fact, I had the honor of being the first one to go to him in confession... "

3. One Friday night at the Bhagini, with 4 of us having a booze party with an ex-colleague:

Ex-colleague to my friend A: "Hey A, I heard that a new girl has joined the company. Apparently, very homely type."

A (half-drunk and significantly self-conscious): "Yeah, she has. And she looks very beautiful."

Ex-C: "I heard that there's a lot of competition going on to get her attention. What about T (another colleague who hadn't come then but was quite enchanted with the new entrant)? Is he in the bandwagon too?"

A (rather forcefully): "T????? T is a competition to himself. How can he be a competition to others, especially in this situation?"

4. Performance Review:

Colleague 1: "Man...this guy P is terrible. I just had my performance reviewed by him and not one thing did he say positive about me. You're next. GOOD LUCK, U!!"

U comes out of the discussion room after an hour looking pretty much flabbergasted. P comes out with an expression that is a mixture of boredom and sadistic hunger and wanders away.

Colleague 1: "Hey, what happened man? You look like you had a heart attack!"

U: "Yeah, tell me about it. I wish I had that instead of what I had to listen about my performance."

Colleague 1: "Really? What did he say? The same old thing?..."

U: "You bet. I wish I was a victim of that tsunami wave. I don't think I am going to get the payhike I have asked for."

Colleague 1 (with a signature guffaw that indicates the advent of a oneliner): "I don't see the big difference. He is a tsunami, I am Sri Lanka and you are Indonesia!!!"

5. And finally:

It's a dog's life..or a software pro's?
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

Never underestimate...

2005-09-19T22:33:00.000+05:30

...others' peripheral vision in restaurants.

...a project as gone for good when the client hasn't responded after 6 months.

...the tendency of female colleagues to not appreciate a joke.

...Bangalore's traffic.

...the enduring aura of adventure classics like Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark.

...the creativity of Indians (check this).

Fortunately or unfortunately, I never seem to learn.

Jack-ashes

2005-09-14T22:53:00.000+05:30

Now that a hard-fought series is over, time for some nonsense. Listed below are what I expect to be thoughts of the people involved in the Ashes series this year.

Shane Warne: "No matter how many wickets I take, the $#@^%^ batters screw it worse than I do some maids!!!"

Kevin Pietersen: "Gotta give a beer to Warney. If not for the spilt catch, Thorpy would have surely come back to the team."

Damien Martyn: "Thank heavens for the substitute. Else Punter would have dropped me for the fourth test. But where is my lucky bat? Damn!"

Ricky Ponting #1: "Them bloody poms. Whado they think? I will use as many subs I can when they come in 18 months time. F*** 'em all!!!"

Ricky Ponting #2: "If I drop Dizzy (Gillespie), then what if Pigeon (McGrath) retires? Should I give a chance to Kasper? And Marto and Gilly? What the hell went wrong with 'em? And why is Pup (Michael Clarke) not delivering?"

Michael Vaughan: "We are the Champions!!!" (sung to the tune of a song by the same name from Queen)

Ashley Giles: "I would like to meet Henry Blofeld now. Isn't he the one who called me "wheelie-pin" or something?"

Brett Lee: "Punter should send me to open the batting. Atleast Warney and I handle the (second) new ball better than those two idiots (Hayden and Langer)!!!"

Simon Jones: "I think I am a bigger deal than David Beckham. Hey, he can't even swing the ball the right way!!!"

Michael Kasprowicz: "AAAAAGH....not that horrible nightmare of edging the ball again!!!"

Glenn McGrath: "Hello everyone. In case you didn't notice, I joined the 500 club."

John Buchanan: "If my job is on the line, lets consider the possibilities. Punter may be on trial too so that would mean Gilly would become captain. Now, Gilly's off-field weaknesses are..."

Birthday baloney

2005-09-05T22:46:00.000+05:30

Time: circa 7 PM IST

Friend calls.

Me: "Hello"

Friend: "Hello, Murli. Yen saar, phone maadidre ethode illa anthira. Yen samachaara?"

M: "Lo, ushaar irlilvo. Adikke nenne phone maadidhaga answer maadlilla. Sorry."

F: "Sari ok bidu. Hey Murli, ivath nin birthday na?"

M: "Illa pa. Yaar heliddu?"

F: "Aye ninnajji, sarig helo. Ivath nin bday na ilva?"

M: "Howdappa."

F: "Sari Murli. Haagidre MANY MANY YAPPI RETURRRNS OF DEE DAY!!!"

Both: "HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA............."

For the benefit of those who don't understand Kannada, here's the translation:

Me: "Hello"

Friend: "Hello, Murli. What sir, you don't answer if I call you. What's up?"

M: "Dude, I am not well. That's the reason I didn't answer your call ydy. Sorry."

F: "Never mind. Tell me something, is today your bday?"

M: "Nope. Who told u that?"

F: "Bugger, tell me the truth. Is today ur bday?"

M: "Yes."

F: "Ok Murli. In that case, MANY MANY YAPPI RETURRRNS OF DEE DAY!!!"

It looks idiotic alright, but the way I was wished was so funny, it was one of the rare moments I laughed for the past 3 days having been hit by illness.

Garfield's theory of Anatomical Distribution of Information

2005-08-27T17:57:00.000+05:30

Garfield's theory of Anatomical Distribution of Information
Originally uploaded by moulin rogue.

Nonsense....Neenu?

2005-08-25T00:23:00.000+05:30

If men are from Mars and women are from Venus, then why was Earth chosen to make them meet?

Stupidity is a gift too. After all, if every man never stops thinking till death, then isn't it appreciable to think dumb? And even fail to think?

The price of fame is not lack of privacy, but lack of piracy. Ask poor Anu Malik. No one copies his tunes, do they?

Many people think football is a game for ruffians. I strongly advise those with a heavy lisp NOT repeat that generalization in Moscow.

If all Miss Indias want to become the next Mother Theresa, how come none of the Mr.Indias wants to become the next Pope John Paul?

News Flash: A group of sheep were recently arrested in an Indian metro. Apparently, they were "ewe-teasing".

Software Engineer: Someone whose best skills are never mentioned in his/her resume (examples: messenger emoticon shortcuts, game cheatcodes).

Sign on the neighborhood trash truck: "We love track and field events. Our favorite is Hop, Step, and Dump!!!"

And finally...

He who laughs last, got the joke late.

F.O.O.L = Fed On Obstinate Lunacy

2005-08-22T09:47:00.000+05:30

"You can fool some people all the time, you can fool all the people some of the time, but you can't fool Mom!!!"

Explains why my mother discovered me drunk before my dad did...twice over! Sometime ago.

Ask a silly question....

2005-08-19T13:19:00.000+05:30

What I would like to see in my elders
Originally uploaded by rogueplaneteer.

Looking outside the window
Originally uploaded by rogueplaneteer.

A letter to my gym trainer...

2005-08-18T12:26:00.000+05:30

Sir,

I know it's none of my business to know about your personal status. Frankly, I don't even care whether you are single or not. But I need an explanation as to why the arrival of a few brave women to the common batch of the gym every morning has caused a change of the music tracks from Metallica (The Memory Remains), Limp Bizkit (MI2 theme), Cranberries (Zombie) and so on to Jennifer Lopez (Jenny from the block), 50 Cent (In da club), Robbie Williams (Feel), Enrigue Iglesias (sorry, I forgot the song) etc. Please address this urgent issue at the earliest.

Thanking you,

A sincere student

PS: I am ready to sponsor earplugs for the women.